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The Quiet Man

/ Mark Brady / 2 Comments

I have always admired the man with experience in his hair and wisdom in his eyes. You’ve seen the type. They usually are tall, thin, and have grey hair. They typically have a subtle smile on their face. They watch and observe but say very little unless asked to contribute.

I think of the man pictured here in this post. I recall a time when I was mowing the church lawn, and I can’t remember why I was upset, but when Pastor Russ pulled into the parking lot, I immediately felt an atmosphere of peace come over the place. It was then I nicknamed him “Moses” for he helped me that day, and I considered him “my deliverer.” God knew what was going on. He knew my struggles, and He had heard my complaints. God sent me Moses.

I desire to be a “quiet man” without grey hair. Even at age 60, I still have a decent head of hair and very few grey strands. It’s the only good thing about my physical being. Trust me, I’ve seen the rest of it! But I respect the demeanor of a “quiet man.” I find it difficult to hold my tongue often, especially when I witness an injustice, or am offended. Too many times, I speak out first.

The hoary [grey] head is a crown of beauty and glory if it is found in the way of righteousness (moral and spiritual rectitude in every area and relation).
Prov. 16:31 (AMPC)

Post this at all the intersections, dear friends: Lead with your ears, follow up with your tongue, and let anger straggle along in the rear. God’s righteousness doesn’t grow from human anger. So throw all spoiled virtue and cancerous evil in the garbage. In simple humility, let our gardener, God, landscape you with the Word, making a salvation-garden of your life. James 1:19-21 (MSG)

So if I want to be a “quiet man,” I need to apply the word of God in my life. After accepting this truth, I should practice and practice and practice being slow to anger and listening with my heart. I should have started working much earlier on this. I will probably have grey hair by the time I master it.

Copyright © 2022 Mark Brady. All rights reserved.

So What?

/ Mark Brady / Leave a comment

Have you ever noticed how quick some people get upset, and at times over the littlest things?  It can seem silly at times, but don’t tell them that.  It could only build more frustration.

The funny thing about these individuals is this; they “choose” to get upset.  I learned that truth many years ago while attending marriage counseling with my first wife.  The counselor pointed out my wife can’t “make me mad” just like she can’t “make me hungry”.  That made sense.

Ignoring things in life that bother you can be a challenge, but not impossible.  One technique is to look at the overall situation and to ask yourself, “Does it really matter?”  Finding a way to say. “So what?” is important.

The alternative is flying off the handle.  Spouting words that can hurt, cut and potentially do permanent damage to the receiver of those “acts of rage” that could take years to overcome.

You can definitely pray and ask God to help you, and partner that with help from key identifiers.  Signals inside you that may indicate your tolerance level is rising to a boiling over point.  That can be the time to walk away quietly, or simply correct the frustration issue without commenting on it.

It is easier to change yourself, than to try to change another person.

The Bible says this about the importance of responding correctly:

Respond gently when you are confronted
    and you’ll defuse the rage of another.
    Responding with sharp, cutting words[a] will only make it worse.
    Don’t you know that being angry
    can ruin the testimony of even the wisest of men?
2 When wisdom speaks, understanding becomes attractive.
    But the words of the fool make their ignorance look laughable.
3 The eyes of the Lord are everywhere
    and he takes note of everything that happens.
    He watches over his lovers,
    and he also sees the wickedness of the wicked.
4 When you speak healing words,
    you offer others fruit from the tree of life.
    But unhealthy, negative words do nothing but crush their hopes.  Prov. 15:1-4

One thing to remember is; your outburst can ruin your witness of the love of God before others.  That’s a sobering thought.  People tend to remember a single outburst instead of the countless acts of love that came in the days before.  It’s not fair, but unfortunately true.  Choose to react with one of the fruits of the Spirit of God.  “Love, joy, peace, self-control, kindness, goodness, forbearance, and gentleness.  It’s a better way to go. Oh! And in the spirit of transparency, I needed this post probably more than anyone else!

Copyright © 2021 Mark Brady.  All rights reserved.

Hard of Hearing, or Hard Headed?

/ Mark Brady / 2 Comments

I’m still reading through the book of Job, in the Bible.  I think he is both, hard of hearing and hard headed.  He is not listening to what his friends are trying to say to him.  As well, he is hard headed enough to not realize how arrogant he is.  I’ve had a taste of that lately.  The arrogance, I mean.

You see God instructed me on how to handle a situation, and I would have sworn to you that I heard him.  But in the sad reality of things, I wasn’t applying it, and of course people got hurt.  Then I felt like a jerk, and I was acting like one.  I thought I was right though and in some things, I was, but how I chose to express my being right, was wrong.

I should have remembered the verse, Proverbs 15:1 “A gentle response defuses anger, but a sharp tongue kindles a temper-fire.” (MSG)

So I don’t want to be “hard of hearing” when it comes to receiving wisdom, understanding, and instructions from God.  And I really don’t want to be “hard headed” when it is time to apply those words from God.  I don’t want to be a jerk, and I don’t want to hurt anyone, so I find myself asking God to help me to; pause, think, and respond with one of the fruits of the Spirit, and I think that will do the job just fine.

Copyright © 2021 Mark Brady.  All rights reserved.

Why Do You Let Your Emotions Take Over?

/ Mark Brady / Leave a comment

The title to this blog is a good question.  One asked by Job’s friend, Eliphaz in Job 15 from the Bible.  The reason we do is because it’s natural.  We instinctually go there first, to our emotions that is.  Expressing one’s emotion has gotten so popular these days we can even respond by sending an “emoji”. Of course, not all emotions are harmful, and not all are based in fear.

I remember a time when I got extremely mad and hurt from my father.  On the way home, from that encounter, I ordered a pizza.  I dropped it onto the asphalt on the way to my car due to high winds.  I had to go back inside and order another one.

When I finally got home and was eating it, God whispered, “Why didn’t you turn to me first?”

OUCH!

I thought about it and answered, “Because you weren’t my first thought, God.”

That’s probably why we turn to our emotions first and allow them, or empower them to take over us.  We have not yet trained ourselves to think of God first, and allow him to help us react to life in a peaceful manner.  Or to respond to a person and or situation with one of the fruits of the Spirit.  Can you imagine how much better life would be, or go if we could retrain our minds?  It is possible!  While in the midst of the process of getting my wife’s immigration to America completed I got depressed, and instead of turning to food, and allowing my emotions to rule, I prayed.

A key to learning to change our behavior is asking God for help to do so.  I had to do this as well.  God loves us so much and doesn’t want to see us get bogged down because we allow our emotions to rule us.  So the next time something happens that “gets your dandruff up”, or raises a red flag, stop, and ask God to help you.  I know you will be glad you did.

Copyright © 2021 Mark Brady.  All rights reserved.

In the Ring

/ Mark Brady / Leave a comment

Charlie 030820 1I was running late for church one Saturday evening, but I was extremely hungry and thought I could concentrate on the message better if I ate dinner before I got there.  That sounds like solid spirituality to me.  So I drove quickly to one of my favorite fast food restaurants, grabbed my order from the drive through window and took off.

I was speeding down a road I was not familiar with when all of a sudden I see my lane is about to end.  I signaled to get over and saw a white truck behind me.  The driver of the white truck, for some reason, sped up.  I suppose he didn’t want me ahead of him.  In a  “Go, or no go” situation I chose to go and got over in front of the white truck.

I was eating my burger and shoving fries in my mouth when I looked in the rear view mirror and saw the white truck tailgating.

I knew he wasn’t a tailgater, tailgating, to get to his tailgate party!

He followed me all the way to church.  I pulled into a parking spot and this big guy hops out of his truck.  All I could hear was, “LETS GET READY TO RUMBLE!” and then the fight bell go off.  The man started speaking loud and using French words.  Well, that’s what people say anyway, “Pardon my French!”  I pointed out to him we were in a church parking lot and there were children around, so he toned it down.

I asked him, “Are you hurt, or did I damage your truck?  He replied, “No.”  I responded, “Then why are you so angry?  And in fact, I had plenty of room to get over, but when you saw my blinker you sped up.”  The man was wearing a black jacket from “Midas”.  A company that fixes mufflers and other things on cars.  I approached him and asked, “What’s going on in your life?  You seem so angry.  Is your job okay?  Having problems at home, with your wife?”  I saw a ring on the proper finger.  Then I offered, “Can I pray for you?”  It was then he bolted back into his truck and sped off.

A friend of mine sent me a recording the other day of a conversation he had with his boss’s boss.  We talked about it a few days after that and I asked for his permission to speak honestly about what I heard.  He gave me that freedom, and I said, “I felt as if you walked in there as a fighter and not a peacemaker.”  My friend got the message and agreed.

Whenever you find yourself in the ring, in the middle of a disagreement, you have two positions you can take.  Either a fighter, or a peacemaker.  Trust me, for I have learned, being a peacemaker is the way to go.  Yes, perhaps you were wronged, or your rights were violated, and you could be right, but what is more right is saying or doing whatever you can to bring peace.

Here is a different translation of a very familiar verse, Matthew 5:9 from The Message (MSG):

“You’re blessed when you can show people how to cooperate instead of compete or fight. That’s when you discover who you really are, and your place in God’s family.”

I encourage you to climb out of the ring and do your best to be a peacemaker.  You and the world will be a better place for it.

Copyright © 2020 Mark Brady.  All rights reserved.