friends

Is It Too Loud?

/ Mark Brady / 2 Comments
Photo by: Anthony via Pexels.com

I know a lady who was once asked to find another church by the pastor’s wife! Why? Allegedly, her worship was too loud. Perhaps the “offender” took attention away from the pastor’s wife’s own loud worship, but I am not sure. Regardless, it was wrong. The lady was devested. When I got to talk to her about the situation, she said she couldn’t help her worship being that loud. She went on to share that if people knew the kind of life God saved her from, they would understand why her worship, praise, and gratitude to God were so exuberant.

Does our praise and witness of God’s love turn people off? Does it cause them not to want to be around us or in any way be like us? Does that list include friends and family members?

Like the lady above, Paul was loud about preaching the good news. About the saving grace of God. Paul knew the love of God and the sacrifice of Jesus, and he wanted everyone else to know too. He, also, was appreciative of the life Jesus saved him from. To quiet him down, he was beaten and thrown into prison. Fortunately for us, while he was there, he let his pen do the talking and, while in one prison after another, wrote most our New Testament.

We certainly don’t want to water down our witness, especially to please people, but I think there is a way to balance it out where they want to be around us. We need them to be with us so they can feel the love of God through us. I know Jesus had this balance down pat. People flocked around him because he was full of the Holy Spirit. He spoke words of love. It didn’t hurt that he performed miracles too. And we can do the same. Jesus even said in John 14, verse 12:

I assure you, most solemnly I tell you, if anyone steadfastly believes in Me, he will himself be able to do the things that I do; and he will do even greater things than these, because I go to the Father. (AMPC)

So seek a balance with the volume of your witnessing life. Know your audience. Know when to turn it up and when to perhaps press mute and let your actions speak louder than words. I once led my neighbors to God by caring about them and, with my actions, doing what I could do to help them. It wasn’t long before the man of the house asked, “Why are you so different?” That’s when I turned up the volume and shared the good news of the saving grace of God that changes us.

Copyright © 2023 Mark Brady. All rights reserved.

What is Love?

/ Mark Brady / 2 Comments

Love, to me, is like riding a roller coaster.  When you first encounter a roller coaster, you have never been on before you are filled with excitement, wonder, amazement, and even a little scared.  You agree to get on the ride, and the attendant helps you with the restraining device.  The ride starts moving, and you get a half smile on your face simply because you really don’t know what you are in for, and then comes the first hill.

At the top of the first hill is the least scary moment of a ride, but seconds later you will be screaming your head off, hanging on to that restraining device as if your life depends on it, and in reality, it does.  There are twists and turns and ups and downs and tunnels of darkness, and even loops that can change your perspective, and it is about then you say to yourself, “What was I thinking?”  You ride, you hang on, you go through all that commotion and then you are back into the station.  The ride stops.  It is time to get off.  You stagger to the exit, the contents in your stomach have been shaken, not stirred, and you certainly feel it, yet what do you proclaim out loud, “I want to ride it again!”

In a dating relationship, one can certainly get off the ride, but there are some coasters you ride till death do you part.  Now that would make an interesting sign above the entrance to a coaster.  My kids and I love coasters.  There was one Saturday at Six Flags Great America the park wasn’t too busy, and we rode 40 times on roller coasters.  On the last coaster of the day, we stayed on continuously 16 times.  We, as humans, are addicted to love.  We like it, we want it, we crave it, and we need it.

For the past couple of days, I have listened to people on TV try to say what love is.  None of them, even the ones with “Ph.D.” after their names even came close.  Real love is as described in 1 Corinthians chapter 13, and it takes this kind of love (God’s kind of love) to stay in any relationship, from friends to coworkers, to family, and to the spouse.  Let me list a few here:

4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8 Love never fails. (NIV)

The real test to see if YOU are “love” is to replace the word “love” in the above section and insert your name.  You can certainly insert the name of Jesus in there, for we know He is love.  So if you are currently in any relationship let love be your restraint, and hang on.

Copyright © 2023 Mark Brady. All rights reserved.

Celebration of Life

/ Mark Brady / 2 Comments

I have attended several funerals in my lifetime. I have noticed people are starting to call them “Celebration of Life” services. I attended another one this past weekend. (This post is being written on Dec. 21st.) It’s a nice gesture. Family and friends gather, quiet music is played, then there is a briefly given Wikipedia-type history of one’s life. A list of the loved one’s accomplishments, activities, interests, and community involvements. Then, again with music, photos are displayed.

The gathering I went to had a twist. The one being celebrated was still alive. He knows his days are numbered due to being terminally ill with stomach cancer. He told his wife he did not want a funeral but asked her to gather his friends and family to say their goodbyes in person. She did, and they came. Some traveled long distances to be there.

I like the man’s approach, appreciation, and perspective on life. He knows that life is best with people. He expressed his love to each friend and family member. Stories were told, usually followed by laughter, and of course, food was shared as well.

The man is also ready for the moment he journeys from earth to heaven, where he will look up and find himself standing before God and then give an account of his life. I know he has accepted Jesus into his heart, and his life produced good fruit.

If you have not accepted Jesus into your life, and haven’t asked him to forgive you of your sins, now would be a great time to do so. My friend has an idea of when he will pass, but most of us don’t know. With that said, you should take care of this now! And what a way to start the new year but with a new outlook on your relationship with God.

So Happy New Year, everyone. May you be blessed by God abundantly and discover an exciting and adventurous life with Him. Go live life God’s way and celebrate every moment.

13 Now all has been heard;
    here is the conclusion of the matter:
Fear God and keep his commandments,
    for this is the duty of all mankind.
14 For God will bring every deed into judgment,
    including every hidden thing,
    whether it is good or evil. Ecc. 12:13-14 (NIV)

Copyright © 2022 Mark Brady. All rights reserved.

Telling The Truth Can Cost You

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A father was acting out concerning a relationship. He was unhappy about how it was going, and the other person was not acting the way “he” wanted them to, which upset him to no end. There were some names spoken that were not flattering. The father talked about the situation over the phone with his son, and his son listened, but when he tried to correct his father’s attitude, the father got mad and hung up the phone. When the son called back again, he was rudely hung up on by his father.

The son’s motivation was pure as he wrote his father a letter. He tried to get his father to understand how he was treating people in several relationships and was pushing them away, and people did not want to be around him anymore. The son tried to tell his father the truth as lovingly as possible.

The father went ballistic and set out to get revenge on his son. He lied to his son and tricked him into going down to the bank to get him to sign a document that would remove him from all of his accounts and his safety deposit box. Then he removed his son from the deed to his house and even cut him out of his will. Apparently, he really did not like hearing the truth!

When Jesus walked the earth, he successfully told people the truth. Some heard him and accepted his message, changing how they lived, but others did not. They chose to get enraged.

People may not want to lose control over their life, so they will not accept the truth. Or they may fear not knowing what life will be like if they change. Others are deceived into thinking they are fine the way they are, and some feel they will lose status or power if they change. Then there are those who blame others for their actions instead of accepting the truth.

The truth is; the truth will set you free! (John 8:32)

I know of one pastor who won’t share with his wife what the word of God says about how marriage and the home should be set up. On this matter, he once told me, “You may be right, but you will be alone!” What he was saying is that “he” feared being alone if he dared to share the truth with his wife. The sad thing is the problem in their home of the wrong person being the head of the household transferred into their ministry. Whenever the home is not set up right, or the ministry, people get hurt! And in the case of their church, there is a very long list of people who have gotten hurt and have left. If the truth were accepted, their home life would be different, and the wall preventing their church from becoming a world leader would finally be lifted.

Yes, telling the truth can cost you. It could cost you thousands of dollars, your inheritance, a job, or family relationships It cost Jesus his life which is the ultimate price to pay for sharing the truth. Jesus wasn’t afraid of being alone. You may be isolated from friends and family, but you will live in freedom. If you find yourself alone, know that you are not, for you are in the company and presence of God.

Copyright © 2022 Mark Brady. All rights reserved.

They Lost It!

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I know there are several people who absolutely LOVE Christmas. If it was more socially accepted they would leave the tree and the decorations up all year and they would probably go as far as to leave the lights on the house, lit! I know one particular person who has been posting on Facebook a countdown of how many days till Christmas. I think she started it on January 1st.

One Christmas lover does leave ornaments out in various rooms around the house. I heard that one day a friend who wanted to play a joke removed one of the ornaments that were displayed in the guest bathroom. They hung on to it for a few weeks expecting to get a call that would be accompanied by an accusation. The call never came.

Apparently, when the missing ornament was discovered the one who seriously loves Christmas went on a rampage trying to find out what happened to it or who took it. I guess they got quite upset over the ordeal. One family member tried their best to find or order a replacement in order to restore peace in the home but learned the ornament was no longer being made.

It happens. A person’s “joy” can be taken, or even stolen if they let it. It doesn’t take much at times. What we should do is calmly evaluate the situation and realize “no one got hurt”, “it’s only a thing”, and recognize that though it may bother you or hurt it’s not the end of the world. That it was simply an item and not a person. It certainly isn’t worth hurting a relationship over!

My brothers, you will have many kinds of troubles. But when these things happen, you should be very happy (joyful). 3 You know that these things are testing your faith. And this will give you patience. James 1:2-3 (ICB)
[The “joyful” in the parenthesis was inserted by me.]

The joy of the Lord is my strength. Neh. 8:10

The person who took the ornament eventually gave it back and though the Christmas lover laughed and said they were okay they ended the friendship. They lost more than an ornament for a time, they lost a friend. Sad end to the story especially when the ornament (pictured) shared “joy” and was an emblem of love and happiness expressed at Christmas.

Copyright © 2022 Mark Brady.  All rights reserved.

Magkano?

/ Mark Brady / 2 Comments

I heard it said the other day, “Every relationship is a transaction.” This expression caught my attention, and I have thought a lot about it. What the man who said those words went on to share was this, “In each relationship, you are either giving or taking.”

In my lifetime, I have been in a lot of different types of relationships. Working relationships, family relationships, friendships, general acquaintances, and marriage to name just a few. So what the man was saying was that in each one of those relationships, one was giving and one was taking, or at least some percentage of both.

Was I the giver? Or was I the taker? Or somehow did I manage the relationship to give and take? Did I take more than I gave? In some of those encounters with those individuals was I fair? Was I ever starving for so much that I partook first before considering the other’s needs?

I know me and in full disclosure, I have to consciously make an effort to stop talking and purposely make myself ask the other person questions about them. I like to talk, I like to tell stories, after all, I am a writer. But there are times when it is best to not say a word about me, and to listen, to inquire, and show that I care about them.

Jesus certainly was a giver in every relationship. He gave comfort, hope, and teachings on how to live an abundant life, and He still does! He also gave his life so that we may live eternally with Him in heaven.

Are you a giver, or a taker? Magkano (ma-con-o) in Tagalog (language of the Philippines) means “how much?” A phrase I learned to ask my tricycle driver when he would taxi me into town, or back home. It wasn’t long for the local ones to not answer me when I asked them, “Magkano?” I think word had gotten out that the American who had married April Joy Santiago Cruz was generous, and he would often pay more than the actual cost. This was a good reputation to have.

Be a giver. When meeting someone, ask yourself on the inside, magkano? Meaning how much is this going to cost me? You may have a lot of untold stories pent up inside, but investing in another person is always a good investment to make. They will certainly be richer for it, and in many ways, so will you! This will be a good reputation to have.

Copyright © 2022 Mark Brady.  All rights reserved.

It’s Not Me, it’s You

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Have you ever found yourself in one of those relationships where the other person does something that offends you, or hurts you? And then when you tried to share with them how it bothered you they act out and try to turn things around as if it was your fault. What the heck? Right? It can be extremely frustrating.

I was thinking about this scenario and feeling exasperated. I asked God about it as I do now when I am in need of wisdom and understanding. He is so faithful to provide an answer. He shared with me that when you speak “truth” it can convict. This can make them uncomfortable and they can get defensive. The other thing that may happen is they will distance themselves from you.

It may be they come up with excuses as to why they can’t get together anymore, or stop inviting you to events, or family gatherings. What makes it hard on you is they convince themselves and others that “you” are the problem, but it is NOT you, it’s them!

I know it hurts. It’s not right. It’s an injustice. So how do we handle it? As difficult as it is, we must still love them, and pray for them. Realize you are in good company! Jesus was falsely accused. Some of the people around him, religious leaders of that day, etc. were confronted with Truth. It convicted how they should be living. To push Jesus out of their lives they crucified him. I don’t think your family and friends will go to that extreme so don’t despair.

Keep in mind when Jesus wants to enter a person’s life, heart, He stands at the door and knocks. He waits for an invitation to enter. We cannot force someone to change. Continue to speak the truth in love, and hope that your loving actions will be used by the Holy Spirit to work into their hearts.

Behold, I stand at the door and knock; if anyone hears and listens to and heeds My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and will eat with him, and he [will eat] with Me. Rev. 3:20 (AMPC)

Copyright © 2022 Mark Brady.  All rights reserved.

Here’s What You Do

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What do you do when they correct you and then proceed to give you instructions on how to accomplish a particular task? Here is how God responded to Job:

“Do you presume to tell me what I’m doing wrong?
    Are you calling me a sinner so you can be a saint?
Do you have an arm like my arm?
    Can you shout in thunder the way I can?
Go ahead, show your stuff.
    Let’s see what you’re made of, what you can do.
Unleash your outrage.
    Target the arrogant and lay them flat.
Target the arrogant and bring them to their knees.
    Stop the wicked in their tracks—make mincemeat of them!
Dig a mass grave and dump them in it—
    faceless corpses in an unmarked grave.
I’ll gladly step aside and hand things over to you—
    you can surely save yourself with no help from me! Job 40:8-14 (MSG)

It seems as if God was sarcastic.  Knowing very well Job couldn’t do anything he asked him to do. As we humans are now on Earth, there is no way we can know everything! I was talking to a friend the other day about this same issue, and I mentioned how I had learned to say, “I’ll take that under advisement”.  He laughed and then shared what he says, which is, “That’s a great idea.  I’ll look into it.” Both responses sends the “know it all” away with a sense of pride and accomplishment. They probably feel as if they just helped another one!

God was sarcastic with Job, because He knew Job couldn’t do those things, or even knew how. We don’t know what a person knows, so perhaps what to do is simply listen, and execute our escape as soon as possible. That’s better than hurting the other person or debating and or arguing.

Copyright © 2022 Mark Brady.  All rights reserved.

He Finished Well

/ Mark Brady / 2 Comments

Later today, I am going to the funeral of the man pictured here, a friend.  I have known this man for probably 54 years.  After I heard the news last Friday evening, I was latter on Facebook.  A lady from his church posted his obituary and arrangements.  Below her post, people who knew him, started remembering, and honoring him.  They commented about his smile, his kindness, his servant’s heart, and his laughter. They were good words.

I begin reflecting on this out pouring of love, and thought about what kind of life one lives that moves people to respond as they were.  It didn’t take long for the answer to appear in my heart.

First, and foremost, you love.  You love God, and then love others.  You chose to ignore what other people say about someone, and you love them anyway.

Secondly, you show kindness.  You show it at work, at church, in your community, and at home.  With customers, family and friends.

Third, you serve others, which really is “love” in action. One man posted how my friend came and got them after their car would not start.

You do all this, not to receive kind words spoken or written about you when you die, but because this is the example Christ demonstrated for us while he walked the earth.  It’s simply the kind of life God calls us to.

7 I have fought an excellent fight. I have finished my full course with all my might and I’ve kept my heart full of faith. 8 There’s a crown of righteousness waiting in heaven for me, and I know that my Lord will reward me on his day of righteous judgment. And this crown is not only waiting for me, but for all who love and long for his unveiling.  2 Tim. 4:7-8 (TPT)

In the above verse, Paul compares living life on earth as a race. It’s not a competition though with others to see who finishes first, second, or third. And unlike youth community sports programs, not everyone will receive a participation trophy! It’s about reaching the finish line, with God, and in my friend’s case, he finished well.

Copyright © 2022 Mark Brady.  All rights reserved.

They Don’t Like God

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I was involved in an interesting discussion the other day.  Okay, some might even call it an argument.  You know how those go, someone, or both may say something hurtful to the other person.  Not really meaning it, but to push a button.  I used to stand close to the buttons in elevators and ask people, “What floor?”  Then after pressing the correct button announce, “I like pushing people’s button.”  Not really true, but at least it made them smile.

Back to the, “discussion”.  I was accused of being so bad that even certain people close to me don’t want to be around me.  This issue used to really bother me.  A lot of tears have been poured out believing that somehow I was that horrible.  Its funny how easily satan can get you to believe a lie.  I strive to be “Christ” like.  To be like God, loving.

In the middle of that, “discussion” wisdom and understanding came to me for the first time concerning this issue.  It’s not me they don’t like, it’s God!  They don’t like God.  In fact, they don’t like being in the presence of God, and when a person lives as God calls them to then surrounding them is God’s presence.  Consider this;

God is perfect and hasn’t done anything wrong to them, but yet they don’t want to be around God either!

The other person doesn’t want to feel uncomfortable simply because you are there amongst them.  Their sinful heart, chosen lifestyle, or demons get irritated when you are there.  But they will lie about you, make all kinds of wild, and false accusations of things that you have never done, and because you have a soft heart, you begin to think they are right.

Now knowing this doesn’t make it easier to deal with the hurt when you aren’t invited to be a part of the office gatherings, friend’s party, or even family gatherings, but at least you have understanding as to why.  Praying for those, the Spirit of God is working on, helps.  It helps by keeping your attitude in the proper place.  But let me say this, “I’m sorry they treat you that way.  It isn’t fair at all.”  I find comfort in the following verse:

“You’re blessed when you feel you’ve lost what is most dear to you. Only then can you be embraced by the One most dear to you. Mat. 5:4  (MSG)

Copyright © 2021 Mark Brady.  All rights reserved.