give

I heard it said the other day, “Every relationship is a transaction.” This expression caught my attention, and I have thought a lot about it. What the man who said those words went on to share was this, “In each relationship, you are either giving or taking.”

In my lifetime, I have been in a lot of different types of relationships. Working relationships, family relationships, friendships, general acquaintances, and marriage to name just a few. So what the man was saying was that in each one of those relationships, one was giving and one was taking, or at least some percentage of both.

Was I the giver? Or was I the taker? Or somehow did I manage the relationship to give and take? Did I take more than I gave? In some of those encounters with those individuals was I fair? Was I ever starving for so much that I partook first before considering the other’s needs?

I know me and in full disclosure, I have to consciously make an effort to stop talking and purposely make myself ask the other person questions about them. I like to talk, I like to tell stories, after all, I am a writer. But there are times when it is best to not say a word about me, and to listen, to inquire, and show that I care about them.

Jesus certainly was a giver in every relationship. He gave comfort, hope, and teachings on how to live an abundant life, and He still does! He also gave his life so that we may live eternally with Him in heaven.

Are you a giver, or a taker? Magkano (ma-con-o) in Tagalog (language of the Philippines) means “how much?” A phrase I learned to ask my tricycle driver when he would taxi me into town, or back home. It wasn’t long for the local ones to not answer me when I asked them, “Magkano?” I think word had gotten out that the American who had married April Joy Santiago Cruz was generous, and he would often pay more than the actual cost. This was a good reputation to have.

Be a giver. When meeting someone, ask yourself on the inside, magkano? Meaning how much is this going to cost me? You may have a lot of untold stories pent up inside, but investing in another person is always a good investment to make. They will certainly be richer for it, and in many ways, so will you! This will be a good reputation to have.

Charlie 69.jpg “No! I won’t give it to him,” cried out the six year old.

“But it will please God. It’s better to give than to receive, and you get lots of toys from McDos.” (What they call McDonalds in the Philippines.)

He shakes his head indicating, “no.”

“And you know what? I bet if you give your car to him it won’t be long before you get blessed in a bigger way. Okay? Let’s go over to the next table and give him the car.”

“No!”

It’s hard to teach a child something that goes against what his culture screams, “Take care of yourself first!” If he only knew. We were at the mall, and I wanted like crazy to see the bewilderment on my little friend’s face when the other young man received something he didn’t earn, or even ask for. There is something about “unexpected joy”. It looks right, and I know, it feels right. Then, if my young friend had given the toy away, I was going to take him to the gaming area where you play games of chance to get tickets, only to cash them in on cheaper toys, because he likes it.

I suspect God is the same way with us. “Come on, give, and it will be given to you. Trust me in this.” But it defies our human logic, and we hang on to something that is cheap. It’s so hard for us to imagine that we will have enough or more than enough when we are already hurting. If you only knew, there is freedom, and tremendous joy in giving. God knows of this joy, because He gave us his only Son, Jesus. Now you know.

brady, mark a.

Words to inspire you

Magkano?

If You Only Knew