Last week I mentioned how my new life with my Filipino wife wasn’t easy in the beginning. There were obvious things to overcome. Cultural differences being a big one, and even though she can speak English, our language has enough quirks to rattle anyone. I’m glad I don’t have to learn English. A friend once told me she had ESL and I asked her if it was terminal. (English, Second Language)
I knew if our marriage was going to survive, it had to be built on love. I got the bright idea to post the characteristics of love from 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a all over our apartment in the Philippines. I thought seeing the Post-it Notes would always remind us to be loving.
In the midst of one heated battle I went around and removed, ripped, and threw the Post-its away. I thought, “Love isn’t working!” But the honest truth is this, I wasn’t working love.
God’s word tells us that love never fails, so the problem wasn’t love, but me. I had the love laws in my head, but they had not made their way into my heart. Once things are in your heart they come out of your mouth. The words that come out of your mouth affects how you live, because they are based on what you believe to be true.
In practical terms, once the laws of love were in my heart it caused me to act and react, then say things to my wife in a loving way more consistently. That made all the difference in the world. One thing that also helped was believing she really loved me unconditionally. Reminds me of God. Her love to me has replaced past hurts. I’m still learning to let my first reaction be love, but it’s getting easier. My wife gives me lots of opportunities to practice. Kidding. (Well sort of.)
I encourage you to learn the love laws for yourself, and then place them into your heart. Life is better when you love.
1 Corinthians 13:4-8a (NET Bible)
4 Love is patient, love is kind, it is not envious. Love does not brag, it is not puffed up.
5 It is not rude, it is not self-serving, it is not easily angered or resentful.
6 It is not glad about injustice, but rejoices in the truth.
7 It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
8 Love never ends.
Copyright © 2020 Mark Brady. All rights reserved.